Tuesday 3 January 2012

"Don't tell me what to do!" - Resolutions


Happy New Year to all readers of this blog. Thank you for your continued interest, comment and support. 


I feel as if I'm at the top of a mountain called 2012. I'm about to desend and feel the exhilaration of experiencing a trip into the unknown. Here I go......wheeeeeeee...


It's that time again isn't it? A time when the newspapers and radio programmes are full of reports about 'New Year Resolutions'.


Well, I'm too long in the tooth to fall into that trap anymore. I will not be making any resolutions. As soon as I put myself in a rigid framework of "you can't have it, you can't do it", I will rebel. The wronged under 10-year-old mini me, shouts in my ear, "don't you tell me what to do!"


My husband of almost 18 years, once said to me many years ago, "I know how to get the best out of you." "Oh really?" "I let you do anything you want to do and then you don't want to do half of it!" How true.


My former husband made life extremely difficult when I wanted to pursue certain activities. It caused a huge amount of grief and problems, but I refused to 'give in'. (I didn't understand then, the emotional baggage that both of us had bought into the marriage.) Sadly many years later, the marriage ended and I lived on my own. I had complete freedom to carry on with my activities. I didn't. There was no need to fight for my survival anymore.


But even though the 10-year-old mini me will still attempt to hijack me and influence my decision making, I can distance myself from her and use some mature emotional intelligence to make choices. Most of the time. I'm not perfect.


I may have hopes, ideas, daydreams, plans and expectations, but I know from experience that most of what will happen this year personally, nationally and globally, will be unexpected, unplanned, unknown and in some cases unwanted. eg: As I'm writing this, a friend is having a cope with wind damage to her property. She won't be alone today, but no-one will have known that that's what they would be doing today. 


I will manage events in the best way I can. I will be concerned about what I can do, with what I have got and not spend valuable time and brainpower, imagining what I can't do, with what I haven't got and will never have.


I will start each day with some sort of idea how I wish to fill the next 17-18 waking hours. I will have some sort of routine to guide me (Subject for next blog), but I will have freedom of thought to make choices.


There will be times for my own safety and wellbeing, when I am told what to do by other people and will listen. But there will also be times, many times, when I will judge the situation for myself and make my own decisions. 


I will use all my seven senses in decision making. Seven?


Sight
Sound
Smell
Taste
Touch
and not forgetting: 
Common Sense
Sense of Humour


Back to the resolutions. Is number one 'lose weight'? Probably. Certainly if the papers and slimming club advertisers are anything to go by. It makes most money and has done since the nineteenth century. Will we never learn?


Don't do this! Don't do that! It's a recipe for failure. Much better to tell ourselves what we can do and why it would be a good idea, even good fun. Carrot or stick? Carrot please.


One of my plans this year is to be a London 2012 Games Maker (Volunteer). I have been offered a position. My first training day in February 4th. I am genuinely excited about this unique opportunity. What do I need more than anything else to be able to participate fully? Good health.


I will need stamina. To maximise stamina, I need to haul around less weight.
I will need physical health. I need to maximise my immune system, to give any bugs floating around, a battle on their hands.
I will need mental strength. I need to maximise my common sense abilities with a quick thinking, adaptable brain. 
I will need emotional strength to manage challenging situations and  a variety of human conditions.


I will need all the above and it is solely up to me to get those needs met. I will not be expecting others to get my needs met. I will not be blaming others if I don't succeed at getting my needs met. 


So here we go. Do join me. This could be fun. Hold on tight...


©RitaLeaman2012

2 comments:

Madyliz said...

love it Rita, hope you suceed and I will try and suceed as well by reading your blogs they inspire me...lol

Little Jem said...

Good Stuff, Rita! Agreed. Have you read a book called "The Mouth Trap: the butt stops here" ?!? All about over-eating tendencies, and the way our inner child/ inner brat can hijack us! A very different sort of 'diet' book, with methods and suggestions based on NLP.